Three month Post Op and a SUPER update

So I have been going at this for three months now and I will just say that I am overall happy with my decision, even though there are many ups and downs in this process. That being said, lets talk about successes!
 Below are pre surgical measurements:
Measurements:
Weight: 267 pounds
Bust: 52"
Neck:  17"
Waist: 55"
Hips :  51"
Biceps: L: 16" R: 16"
Thighs: L: 31.5" R: 31"

Looking at now three months Post Op: (11/30/12)
First of all, I have decided while measurements are a great way to see progress, I really don't want to track that every month. It all comes down to how I feel and that is way more important to me than centimeters and inches lost. So no measurements like that... at least not right now.
Weight: 240 (That is a 27 pound loss in 3 months!)
I went down a bra size, at least circumference wise and am rocking a 42DD very comfortably now.
I am wearing almost all XL size shirts now, with a few XXL mixed in
All of my jeans are now size 18. (My 20s are falling off!)

I am beyond happy with this progress, but things have slowed down these past couple weeks and I found myself being able to eat pretty much anything I wanted in moderation, which is great, but not allowing me to progress as fast as I would have liked. So I went in to get a fill! I have a band that only holds 4cc and now have a fill totaling 2.4cc. That means it is over half closed! Let me tell you... I have MAJOR restriction. I almost regret getting so heavy of a fill this time around because I can barely tolerate any solid food. I have been fighting a cold for about 3 weeks on and off because it recirculates in my house and at school... we just cant shake it! So Im hoping that when I start feeling better the band will relax a little. Until then, I am taking suggestions for squishy meal ideas! ;)

We took Austin to Disneyland this past Tuesday, it was so much fun! It was a whirlwind of a trip that involved leaving late Monday night, going to disney ALL day Tuesday, then driving back to Blythe Tuesday night, and then driving back to Phoenix on Wednesday morning so I could make it back in time to take my test in Critical Care class! Talk about a crazy couple of days! I did get to see my Bestie Sweets. She is the cheese to my crackers, let me tell ya. You know how you have those moments in life with people that just make you smile and know that everything is going to be ok? She does that for me ALL. THE. TIME. It was so much fun to spend the day with her and her family at Disney, and even though I was super tired, it was so worth it!!!

I will post some pictures soon from Disney and such, Hope y'all are well. :)

Ticked off!

I just wrote a crazy long post and blogger deleted it!!!!
The kid is awake so no time to re-write the whole thing now! Sorry peeps!

Quick rundown:
I suck at blogging. (What the majority of the post was about)
Two month postoperative: 244 pounds
Today: 241 pounds (hit my 25 pound loss!)
Still wearin my NSV jeans in 18!

I'm sorry about my lack of posts, I had high hopes... But I'm not sure I'm cut out for this. :(

I'll be in touch soon, y'all have a super thanksgiving!!!! Xoxox

Sunday check in!

Things have been so crazy around here with finals and getting my house back to normal from weeks of neglect!

I am happy to say, though, that I have kept losing.

And I totally forgot to celebrate last week by saying that I hit the official 20 pound loss mark from day before surgery to last check in, two weeks ago... 267 to 247! Happy dance!!!!

This week I weighed in at 245. That's a 2 pound change!

Seems like I am averaging a pound per week, which I know is good an healthy, BUT seeing as how I've been playing softball at least 2 nights per week an exercising more in general, I was hoping for a slight increase. Especially because a mid week weigh in showed me 242! I even text a picture of it to Sweets! I know this mid week weighing is a bad habit, but I was feeling really good that day and just wanted to see. I am beginning to wonder too, if maybe weighing on Sunday is a bad idea since we typically go out Saturday night for dinner and Saturday end up being my worst diet day not to mention in usually dehydrated and holding onto water like there is a drought coming! Maybe I will change weigh in day to Friday. That way I have all week to work off the bad decisions from the weekend prior. ;)

Also, I finally figured out what NSV means! And I've totally got a couple! First: I bought a pair of jeans at Target from the regular size section!!!! Size 18 and they fit like a dream! Granted in my dream, a slight belly bulge is totally acceptable! :)

Another NSV: I participated in the Susan G Komen race for the cure and walked the entire course without feeling out of breath AND then decided my friend and I would walk back to the car with Austin, my son, in his jogging stroller... Well apparently from 17th ave back to 1st street is a bit of a hike! And according to my Nike plus app I walked a total of 7.5 miles that morning! only 3.2 of which was part of the race! Needless to say, I was sore and tired the next day!!!

Well that's all for now! I'll leave You with some pics!
First is those victory jeans from target, and my new haircut! (BTW Siri now calls me hot mamma.) and the others are from the race and include me and barrel boy from KNIX and me and Austin. :)

Thanks for checking In y'all!!!

Sunday Weigh in on Monday!

Stepped on the scale yesterday, but with the Race For the Cure going on, I didn't have time to check in on here. :)

10/13/12 - 247
That's a one pound change. :) I'll take it.

OH and something new! I got a new car! I am so excited to have more room to cart around my kiddo and all his crap! :)

Lots of pictures to come from the race and maybe even one of my new baby!

Happy Monday Ya'll!!!
xoxo

Fills and Thrills... (on the scale that is...)

So I got my first fill... I was terrified, but I sucked it up and I am so glad I did. (Thanks for the Pep Talk Phoenix Ladies group!)  I feel so much more in control of my band now. Before the fill I was feeling like I could eat pretty much whatever I wanted and however much I wanted which, HELLO!, is how I got this way in the first place. So I had this period of blues and whining, but post-fill am feeling sooooo much better.

My last weigh in was on Sunday this past weekend on 10/7/12:

248 pounds was the magic number!
(Almost to the 20 pound mark... Ive even seen it a few times, though it wasn't on an official weigh in day so I am not counting it!)

So that's -2 pounds since my one month post op weigh in. I stayed at 250(ish) for like 3 weeks, which probably contributed to my blues and to my lack of posting. I promise not to be a big baby anymore!

I will include a picture that I sent to my Bestie "Sweets" to show off my progress since she lives so far away. I can really tell in my lower back right now. (Did YOU know there was muscle there? Cuz i had no idea I had muscle there, lol!) My boobs are still ginormous in this picture, which I am not sure is a problem yet or not.. haha! Hubby doesn't seem to mind. I do think I am ready for a smaller bra though, everything seems to jiggle and wiggle in there, and girls, you know if you are well endowed like me, having some control over those tatas is super necessary! I should also note that I am wearing size 20 jeans now, and can even fit into some 18s! woot!!!

Ignore my Son's messy room!

OK RECAP!
Current weight: 248
Current Jean size: 18
Current shirt size: xxl or xl (the picture above shows my new shirts in XL... barely room for the girls, but oh well! It made me feel pretty! And I can easily wear my XL Susan G Komen Chamberlain Team shirt for the race)
Current Bra size: 44 DD or 42 DD depending on which style I am wearing at the moment.
Current Fill: 1.4cc
For more measurements see my previous post!

Thanks for checking in Y'all! xoxo

Better Late than Never... One Month Post OP 9/30/12

I have been bogged down by school so much that I have had no time for anything extra. I am so sorry for my lack of weigh in posts, though I assure you that they still happened. :) This will be back dated so I can catch you all up!

Here are my STATS from Pre Surgery a month ago:

Measurements:
Weight: 267 pounds
Bust: 52"
Neck:  17"
Waist: 55"
Hips :  51"
Biceps: L: 16" R: 16"
Thighs: L: 31.5" R: 31"

One Month Post Op Measurements:

Weight: 250 pounds (9/30) (-17 total pounds since surgery! and 25 pounds lost since May 2012!)

All measurements were taken today, because I forgot.. :(
(10/11/12)
Bust: 50.5" (-1.5)
Neck:  16.5" (-.5)
Waist: 51" (-4.... holy freaking cow, i had to have hubby double check this one...)
Hips :  48.5" (-2.5 again... holy cow!)
Biceps: L: 15.5" R: 15.5" (-1)
Thighs: L: 28.5" R: 28.5"(-5.5)

OK... no more doubting myself... AND I totally should have done this sooner, because that right there is results people!

I am feeling great. I had a slump there for a while, but you will see on my next couple posts that I climbed out of it and then on top of it got a fill! So things are progressing wonderfully! 

My Cutie Pie... my reason for all this.

Here is some cuteness to start your week with...

My Husband is a CAL Bears fan... Imagine his surprise when he came home to this little Devil fan. :)

Wake Up Call!!! (weekly weigh in)

I knew things would slow down, but I didn't expect them to slow down this much.  ESPECIALLY because I haven't been eating out of control, nor have I been shoving my face full of bad foods or huge amounts. In fact, I have been under calories according to FIT Pal, every day.  Hubby says I just need to "release" some pressure if ya know what I mean, and well... yeah that could be part of the issue... Oh well. I am not going to let this get me down, I am just going to learn and grow and move on. I can officially start exercising tomorrow and I am super excited about that. Maybe that will give me the kick in the pants that I need.


Weight the day before surgery: 267
Last Week's Weight: 253.4
Today's weight: 251.4

That's a - 2 pounds. Not a lot, but still a loss... :) Guess that's what happens when you start eating real food again.

Things I am struggling with:

I have NO CLUE what to eat.  (I was told this was the hardest part, and they were right.)
Protein drinks make me want to toss my cookies. (Its a mental thing I swear...)
I am not able to eat the 1500 calories FIT Pal says I need, and some days I don't even get to 1200 (actually most days I don't. I average about 900-1000) Is it like this for anyone else??? The Surgeon wasn't really clear on a calorie count, what are your goals out there in Band Land? 

I'll end with things I am proud of:

No Soda. (None, since surgery and I don't even really want it anymore anyway.)
No Bread. (yep, nada, zilch, zero...)
No Processed sweets. (I won't say no sugar, because well I'm not into lying.. haha But still not a lot of that either...)

Thanks for reading and for all your amazing thoughts and comments that you are willing to share with me. I need all the help and support I can get and I love reading and hearing about your journeys as well. :)

XOXO S

Two Weeks Post Op

I feel Fan-FREAKING-Tastic! Seriously. I haven't felt this good in sooooooo long. There are lots of reasons, the biggest is overcoming the depression from my son's birthing near death. (more on that in another post). I have been getting better and better since, but today I woke up and realized that my face looks different. It's slightly thinner, but that's not what caught my eye... I am literally LIT up y'all. It's weird and exciting to see a glow again where I used to fake it with bronzer and blush. It's nice not to have sunken eyes that look dead inside when seeing my reflection. And it's really nice to know that all of this is happening because I made the decision to stop blaming myself for everything and just allow myself a little bit of happiness and a lot a bit of health.
I am so happy that I made this decision and extremely excited for what is to come!

I am not going to weigh myself like I have been. I am writing this as a promise to myself because I dont want to obsess over the scale. So I will see y'all on Sunday for weigh in day! :)

Xoxo

(ps. My son is fine, don't worry. In fact he is better than fine, he is a medical miracle. The story is just hard to tell because it still tugs at my heart strings. Especially because in taking OB in nursing school right now! Promise to upload his birth story or something some day for those of you that are interested!)

PPS: I did my first 12 hour clinical shift on Wednesday since getting the band. That was super hard! I had a really tough time towards the end of the day because I ran out of gas... Gonna have to figure out a way to keep my energy up!

Ok that's it. For real this time. Xo!

Weekly Weigh In!

I decided that I will only do measurements once a month, otherwise I may drive myself nutso. But I will keep on doing a weekly weigh in and the day that I have chosen is....... drum roll please..... well, OK, duh, its today.

Weight the day before surgery: 267
Today's weight: 253.4

That's THIRTEEN POINT SIX Friggin' pounds!

A Pain in the Port!

Looking for some guidance here, or maybe just some reassurance.
The area where my port is secured to my muscle wall is painful, well not painful, but irritating to the touch. There is an incision almost directly over it and it is not inflamed or hot or anything like that. Do you think its just healing on the inside, where the muscle is attached to the port, and that is the discomfort I am feeling?
You would think that being in nursing school and having a medical background about 90 pages long, I would know this and not be worried. BUT that is the only thing that is hurting more or less. Let me know your thoughts!

One Week Post Op!

If a year ago you were to ask me if I ever thought I would be a size smaller than a 16, my answer would have surely been, Hell to the no. But this amazing opportunity and decision came before me to change my mind, my perspective, my habits, and quite simply, MY LIFE, and now that I'm a week out I know I will never regret this.

The past week has been filled with ups and downs, hunger pangs and nausea, incision pain and a few tears, but seeing that number on the scale drop day after day made it all worth it. I've been eating full, or what I like to call thick liquids for a couple days, and feeling that restriction is so amazing! I know that I can do this with the help of my little band! I don't feel nearly as hungry as I first did and I am learning more and more every day about feeding myself and making sure I get enough water. (my biggest challenge by far is the H2O!) I feel great and am really excited to move on!

One week post op weigh-in:
256 lbs

That's 11 pounds since the day before surgery people!

I know this probably won't last, and I may gain some back when I start eating normal food instead of liquids, but I'm going to soak it in and use this little surge of weight loss, be it actual or water loss - I really don't care, to motivate me to buckle down, make healthy choices and exercise my little heart out. That way when the day comes and I see my goal weight on that scale I will know that I worked my tight little butt off for it and I will own that shiz! (I may even buy myself a trophy... ;-) )

Thank you all for checking in on me, for your thoughts and prayers, and most of all your encouragement! I appreciate all of your comments and emails, they really kept me going this week!

Xoxo

Clear Liquids, growling tummy....

So they say clear liquids for a week..... well that just plain sucks. I am really hungry at this point, and have already contemplated moving on to yogurts and pudding. I can't keep myself energized with just clear liquids and am finding myself fantasizing about oatmeal... yea, oatmeal. So whats a girl to do? Break the rules of course....

Now before y'all yell at me, I just want to say that I feel great. I am not in much pain at all and I can really feel the band working and have already found myself in tune with it. So I gave some pudding a shot, plain ol' vanilla pudding, and it was fantastic! Don't worry, I'm still too scared to push it much beyond that and have been sticking to chicken broth for the most part... I really hope that this phase doesn't last long, I want to get back to normalcy as quickly as possible. (You will come to find while reading this blog that I am as impatient, as I am laid back. Great combination most of the time, but in this case it makes me feel like a yo-yo.)

As far as an update goes, I feel great! My incisions are healing up nicely and I only have a small amount of pain that is localized to those sites. I can feel the band in there... I can feel restriction and even feel full with liquids, but only for a while since they slide right through. I have no gas pains, and only had a little right after surgery, AND they never made their way up to my shoulders. SUHWEET!  I am moving around with ease, and am only sore after sitting for a long time.

Ever hear the saying that nurses make awful patients? Well that goes for pretty much anyone in the healthcare field, and being a nursing student means that I know the limits, which means I know how to push them. So with that in mind, I have gone straight back to mommy life, with help from my own mommy, and am taking care of my little man like this never happened. He didn't give me much of a choice in the matter, bolting right at me as soon as I walked in the door. He has been so sweet, though, he knows that I hurt and even pointed at my belly and said oooooo, which is Owie for a one year old. (you know, in case you didn't know. ;) )

Post Op

Surgery went well! I am up and moving this am with only a little pain. The gas pains are probably the worst part of it all so far.
The barium swallow test was perfect, so I will be able to have liquids this am!!! I'm excited about that!
My friend, we'll call her K-cup, has been amazing throughout this whole process since hubby had to take care of the baby and work. She's a doll!
I will write more soon, just wanted to say thank you for all of your well wishes, thoughts and prayers. I could definitely feel the love here with me!

S

The Day Before The First Day Of The Rest Of My Life

Ok ok, super long title, but it says it all really!

First of all THANK YOU all for following me on this journey and for all of your lovely comments. Knowing that I have this support really makes me less terrified and more excited to move forward. :)

Tomorrow is the big day and I am feeling nervous and excited all at once. It's a good thing I have a messy house to clean and a 14 month old to chase around, otherwise you would find me in the back of my closet spooning cookie dough into my face. Oh yes, this has happened!!!! I am THAT girl.
Thank god that i will have help after too! My lovely parents will be coming to help take care of the kidlet since hubby has to work everyday this weekend, so that will be nice.

So let's talk about fears:
Waking up during surgery
Feeling everything and not being able to say anything
My port getting flipped backwards
Not being able to tolerate liquids after
Failing at this whole process
Letting the whole world down! (drama queen!!!!)

Hopes:
I will come out of anesthesia happy and not screaming and crying like usual.
I will be able to drink water right away since I'm NPO from midnight tonight and surgery isn't until tomorrow afternoon.
I will use this tool to my full advantage and continue on with the healthy diet and exercise that I've already implemented.
Reach my mini goals on time so I don't get discouraged.


There's a mini rundown of my Fears and hopes, with hopes at the end so I can end this positively. I'll leave you with my official Pre surgery stats:

Weight: 267 (yeah I had my last piece of pizza last night and it was damn good!)
Measurements were all the same. :)

First mini goal: 230 by 12/25/2012
I realize this may be low, but I don't want to rush it, after all you never rush a lady when she is primping for a party.

See y'all on the other side!

STATS

I think the most useful tool that I noticed on previous blogs is being honest and keeping track of your actual weight and measurements. This is crazy hard to put out on the internet, but here goes.


Heaviest weight: 285 pounds, just call me Big Mama (9 months pregnant with my son in May, 2011)

Post pregnancy:  270-280 until May 2012

         (probably about 275 here in this pic, taken in October 2011.)


Current weight:  265 and holding strong.
(did get down to 255, but i think that was a fluke because it only lasted a week or two.)

Current Measurements:
Bust: 52"
Neck:  17"
Waist: 55"
Hips :  51"
Biceps: L: 16" R: 16"
Thighs: L: 31.5" R: 31"

(Maybe there is hope for an hourglass figure??)

                         (Taken in July, at about 265 pounds.)

Phase One: The decision

I have spent countless hours contemplating what my life could be like, how different it would be if I wasn't fat. I have yo-yo dieted from age 13 and have had success with weight watchers, but was never able to keep it off. It took almost losing my son when he was born to make this decision, and now that I have, I am not looking back.

My name is Sara and I will soon be a bander. My surgery is on August 30th and I am super excited, nervous, oh and did I mention EXCITED?! I am so ready to take this next step in my life. I am so ready to shop in the regular stores and to chase my son around without feeling winded. I am excited to present myself as a healthy person to my patients, and most of all to look in the mirror and be happy with who I am and what I look like! I can't wait to feel sexy in my own skin and not rely on spanx to make me feel good in a dress. But above all of this, I am ready to take control of my life, to grab a hold and to steer it in the direction I want to go and NEVER, EVER let my weight dictate what I can and cannot do ever again.

I wasn't planning on doing a blog about this, as I am not sure if I will even have time to keep it up, but because I utilized so many different blogs on the journey to my decision, I decided that it would be a good thing to share my story too. And maybe, just maybe, being held accountable by whoever decides to read this will help me along the way as well! Thanks for reading!